my journey

My Journey

My Journey – it was February 2017. I was having an upper respiratory tract infection. Undoubtedly, it was one of the worst infections ever I had in my life. It was the days when I needed to stay up for my business. I had to make an important business deal. My doctor recommended intravenous antibiotics after the examination. I used antibiotics frequently, but it was the first time I would get it intravenously. I thought about important things and had the IV antibiotics

Slow Infection Recovery

After some rest and medicine, I started to feel better. I had a mild cough. In addition, there was an interesting feeling of dryness on my feet. I was applying moisturizer and moving on with my life. Then I went to my ear, nose, and throat doctor for a check on my persistent cough.

My Journey and Life Gets Interesting

The good news was that I didn’t have any problems with the infection. But my doctor said that I had neurological symptoms and it would be good to see a neurologist. I had a neurologist appointment for the next day. The dryness on my feet had increased and I felt as if I had some cuts. I thought that something else was going on in my body.

First Meeting with Neurology

I’ve never been to a neurologist before in my life. He said he would do a few tests after telling my story. One of them was the electrical conduction test on my legs. He said that the neurological findings that started after the infection could be Guillain-Barré Syndrome. He then requested an MRI test. I made an appointment for the next day.

Click Click Click Tok Tok Tok My Journey

When I woke up in the morning, I noticed that my cut-like feelings were increasing and spreading up from my feet. My knee movement was interestingly impaired. Now I was 100% sure that something was happening in my body that I had never experienced before. I got into an MRI machine at a private business and it took exactly 3 hours. The look of other people when I got out was frightening. Undoubtedly, it was a terrible experience for me. I was looking forward to tomorrow.

My Journey
Sometimes it makes you happy and sometimes not…

Last Call for the MS Passengers…

My symptoms had worsened. In addition, my urinary system problems had begun. I went to the hospital with the help of my friend. The doctor examined the MRIs and said I had MS. So my journey started. My doctor gave me information about it. The denial, the first of the 5 stages of grief had begun. I immediately made an appointment with another doctor. He said that my initial MR results were of poor quality, and he redirected me elsewhere. He also requested a test called VEP. Instead of the first MRI that lasted 3 hours, this time it took a little more than 1 hour. Doc told me to come after I got the results.

My Journey and Escape is Getting Harder

Altogether, my symptoms had worsened and I could not walk properly. I had an interesting itch on my back, and speech difficulties were added. A strange hope for the doctor to tell me that I didn’t have MS. I struggled with the stairs and came to my appointment. Unfortunately, I was diagnosed by another doctor that I had MS. The type was relapsing-remitting. A little information about MS, disease-modifying treatment choices, cortisone treatment in the hospital. He said it would be good if I started preventive treatment early.

No More Doubt, But What About Anger?

I knew the truth that I could no longer refuse, whether I wanted to or not. I was an MS patient. All I know about MS was that Pentagram Music Group frontman Murat İlkan had to quit the band because of this illness. It was a disease that I had rarely heard of. Often, it was like a horror story. Why me? What did cause? Malnutrition, office life, stress, laziness, not exercising enough, alcohol. Questions, problems, anger, anger. I got angry with myself a lot during this period. I thought it was a punishment. Did it have to be this way? Evidently, there were huge anger, rebellion, and unhappiness. In addition, lots of fears.


On my journey, I said hello to anger, the second phase in the 5 stages of grief. I spoke with my neurologist and he suggested that I needed professional support. It was obvious that I, who didn’t like psychologists and psychiatrists, needed them. I couldn’t cope with my anger myself. Later, I would see that it was the right decision.

Posted in Me

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *